Before I left on this month long journey, Greta Cowan of Ariel Group, asked me to step out of my "patterns". At the time the most interesting thing for me to do was actually identify my patterns and I have to say I was frightened to see how many I had developed.
Patterns obviously develop the more we age, stay in one place, and settle down. Now you can see why this was frightening to me. So as I travel I have been observing patterns in myself and the people I interact with and it has been incredibly eye opening.
Here are some patterns I have observed in myself.
1. I like to talk
2. I am addicted to moving quickly, probably that is why I run every morning
3. I wear too much black
4. I am too independent
So for the past month I have been trying to get out of these patterns and here are a few things I have learned.
1. An HIV positive woman that spent the majority of her life as a prostitute in Nairobi, is now running her own tailoring business and just bought her first home through the support of Jamii Bora. I listened to her for hours as she shared so many of her dreams with me including her vision of sending her eldest daughter to school in the US.
2. If you walk rather than run the world around you moves more slowly (still not sure how I feel about this one).
3. I actually look pretty good in Pink (this one is thanks to Misbah who left me a beautiful bright pink Pakistani shirt in her closet) one which I am donning at the moment!
4. Allowing yourself to be welcomed into a community and be taken care of can be one of the most fulfilling things in the world. Each place I have gone I have been welcomed with open arms and I have allowed those arms to embrace me. This is something new for me; for so long I saw my independence as a badge of honor.
So patterns, yes, they shape the world, tell us that an African should not run a business in India, a woman should not walk around unescorted in Pakistan, an American should not question her countries policies, and that a young man in the slums of Nairobi should not dream of speaking at the TED conference.
Imagine what might happen if we all tried, just for a day, to step out of our patterns, might we in fact imagine a different world?
I think pattern change number 4 is essential... I am struggling toward the same thing.
ReplyDeleteI think most of us tend to get more out of 1, while it seems the other way round, we get maximum when we do not talk too much and try to listen at maximum......
ReplyDeleteMay be you like to talk but you never talk too much, rather listen with concentration more.
No doubt being independent seems exciting as we move and act freely the way we want, however in my opinion our excitements and joys get double when we share it with some or many others around us......I personally enjoy the things and moments the most that I share with others and the satisfaction that we get out of it serve as a fuuel to do more and expand our mozaic more and more as we move.
Thanks Zahoor, your insight means so much. I think my time in Pakistan made me realize even more the importance of those connections. Your country's foundation is the community and the warmth that radiate from eveyone you meet... thank you for sharing.
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